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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29756661">some things stay the same</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/waveydnp/pseuds/waveydnp'>waveydnp</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 23:20:05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>730</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29756661</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/waveydnp/pseuds/waveydnp</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan doesn't throw around words like forever lightly, but this thing with Phil can't be called anything but, and it stopped being something he feared a long time ago. They're intertwined in ways that go far deeper than rooms in a building.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dan Howell/Phil Lester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>160</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>some things stay the same</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dan doesn't think he'll miss this place. </p><p>He's not as sentimental as Phil; material things don't have any more meaning than people choose to give them, and he's taking everything that matters to a new place. Somewhere bigger and better that's there’s down to the very foundation, with no qualifiers or plausible deniability. The memories, he can keep. They don't belong to the flat they were made in. </p><p>Still, this apartment they've called home for more years than they ever anticipated gave them shelter for some of their most important personal and professional accomplishments to date, and what was only ever supposed to be a temporary rung on a ladder to something permanent became a hell of a lot more. </p><p>Dan doesn't throw around words like forever lightly, but this thing with Phil can't be called anything but, and it stopped being something he feared a long time ago. They're intertwined in ways that go far deeper than rooms in a building. </p><p>Right now it's their bodies. Phil's fingers are laced between Dan’s. Dan has the taste of Phil on his tongue. The curtains are drawn in the moon room, and though the sun outside their window has risen, their intimacy is cradled in the arms of soft grey darkness.</p><p>Phil sighs, a hint of a moan contained quietly to the back of his throat as Dan touches him. Their life is in boxes all around them, but only the trappings of it. What's real can fit anywhere, as long as there's room for the two of them.</p><p>Dan rests his cheek against Phil’s thigh when he's finished, and closes his eyes as Phil’s fingers rake through his hair. They can't stay here all day; there are things to pack, emails to answer, plans to be made. But they have a little while.</p><p>He's starting to drift off when Phil reaches to pull him up. He goes, letting himself be laid down on his back and kissed in a way Phil rarely wants when he can taste himself in Dan’s mouth. Sometimes the sheer vulnerability of moments like this make Dan shudder. Still, after all these years, he finds himself in awe that he gets to have them, and with someone who knows him down to his core. </p><p>Phil knows all of Dan’s mistakes, all his shames and regrets and a lot of the thoughts that make him feel, at times, that he's unworthy of the kind of devotion Phil has shown him. Some scars don't heal, no matter how much time has passed, and Dan knows by now that he’ll never live a life free of doubt. He’ll never know what it's like not to be amazed when someone loves him for real. When someone wants to keep him in spite of it all.</p><p>Phil wants to keep Dan <i>because</i> of it all. Because of all the things, both good and bad, that make Dan the man he is today: one who is brave. One who is damaged. One who can be mean, one who still has days when life feels a little harder than he'd like to endure. </p><p>He's made progress. The doubt is no longer ubiquitous, and on his clear headed days he knows he deserves everything he has and everything Phil gives him. He understands that one argument doesn't mean the end, and setbacks don't mean failure, and the bad days don't last forever. </p><p>Phil kisses down Dan’s chest to his stomach. His hands are cool but his mouth is warm and eager. At this time next year, the world could be a completely different place. They’ll take each other apart in a different room, on different sheets. They’ll order their groceries from a different shop and put a different address on legal documents. Maybe they'll get a new fish. Maybe they'll start thinking about a dog. Maybe. Dan's still not sure he's ready for that.</p><p>Everything that matters will be the same. It'll be the same cold hands that touch Dan’s body, the same warm mouth that kisses him good morning and snarls obscenities in heated video game moments. No matter the kitchen cupboards it's stored in, Dan can be sure that Phil will still be stealing his Crunchy Nut. </p><p>Dan comes quietly with his fingers buried in Phil's hair. Black again, for which he's secretly glad. It's nice when some things stay the same.</p>
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